Estimated reading time: 4 minutes
The more conscious you are of the ways in which you think and behave, the more able you are to find the path to your goals that’s right for you.
Your Metaphors Shape How You Think
“It’s a jungle out there”; “I’ve put that behind me”; “It’s all plain sailing from now on”. What these everyday expressions have in common is that they’re metaphors rather than literal descriptions. Metaphors are more common in the way we talk and think than we normally realise.
In fact, almost everything we say uses metaphor, often implied rather than made explicit. When someone says “I’m in a bad relationship”, they are talking as if the relationship is some kind of container or room that they’re in. If they were speaking literally, they would say something like “I am relating badly to this other person”.
Notice how the implications of the metaphorical statement – that the relationship has some kind of existence of its own and is outside of the speaker – are very different from those of the second statement. In the first case, it’s as if there’s nothing the person can do about the relationship; in the second case, the speaker can make some changes in the way they are relating and maybe get a different outcome.
Listen to Your Own Metaphors
Our emotional state from moment to moment is a response not just to external events but to our internal world – the memories that fleetingly come to mind, our images of what might happen in the future, and what we tell ourselves. The metaphors you use will subtly affect how you feel, and any metaphors that you use habitually will shape both the way you think and your mood.
What images do your habitual metaphors evoke? Do you work with someone who is “a pain”? Is your family life “a nightmare”? Or is everything “running smoothly”? If the way you talk is filled with unpleasant images, you are evoking unpleasant emotions in your listeners – including yourself.
How Do You Think of Your “Self”?
One of the most common yet least recognised metaphors is the “self”. We talk about the self as if it is a lazy employee (“I’m finding it hard to motivate myself”) or an unruly child (“I have no self-discipline”). This distances you from the fact that there is just the one person there – you. Remember that whatever you do, or don’t do, is your choice and your responsibility.
What Kind of Journey Are You On?
If you feel your life is in a rut, and you can’t find a way to progress, use metaphor to help you think creatively. Find a metaphor for where you are right now, and develop it to see how you might move on.
A ‘journey’ is a universal metaphor for life that anyone can relate to: goals are like destinations, challenges are like obstacles along the way, and so on. You could ask yourself, if your life were like a journey, what kind of journey would it be? You can write your answer, discuss it with someone else, or even draw it. The answers can be very revealing. A life which is like a train journey which does not always stop at the right station will feel quite different from a life which is like an uphill struggle with the destination not far ahead, or a sea trip which was plain sailing but is now becalmed.
Try this tip: if you find yourself using negative or limiting metaphors, ask yourself, “What else is this situation like? How else could I describe it?”
This post is one of a series about preparing yourself to clear the blocks to achieving your goals.
If you want to get a head start, why not download the Achieve Your Goals self-hypnosis audio?
It’s a dual-induction guided visualisation designed to help you get clear on what you really want and get the help of your unconscious mind in achieving it.
“I have listened to the download three times. I wanted to get the sense of its effect over a few days. I feel very positive, determined and motivated. Nice intro and easy to get into the calm and relaxed state.” – Marion Anderson, UK
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