Estimated reading time: 5 minutes
Find What’s Already Working in Your Life
There is an increasingly popular approach to organisational and personal change called Appreciative Inquiry, which holds that the best way to improve things is to discover what is already working and then do more of it. Because we tend to get more of what we focus on, paying attention to what is already working well in your life is likely to raise your morale and your self-esteem, and increase the energy available for changing the areas of your life that are not working so well.
If you were to focus just on your problems, with the intention of solving them, it would be easy to overlook the strengths, skills, and inner resources that will help you solve them. You might even forget about the successful strategies you have used in solving similar problems in the past. Plus, it’s a good idea to remember what you have enjoyed and are good at in the past and present, so as to know better what you really want in the future.
Know Your Strengths
To make it easier to find the positives, try these lines of inquiry:
- What do people tell you are your strengths?
- What do the people who care about you regard as your good qualities and abilities? Imagine that you are one of those people who cares about you – put yourself in their shoes, and take a sympathetic look at yourself through their eyes. Better still, ask them – you may be pleasantly surprised.
- Imagine that a good friend is talking about you to someone who has not met you. How would that friend describe your good qualities?
Notice how you feel after focusing on the positive aspects of your life. What has changed?
How to Find What’s Already Working
This exercise is designed to help you focus on the aspects of your life that you want to keep and do more of. Even if you have been telling yourself that your life is terrible, you will be able to find some positive elements there when you look for them.
Step 1. Notice how positive you feel now and rate it on a scale of 1 to 10. This is just to give you a baseline to compare with how you feel after the exercise.
Step 2. What is working in your life? Write it down – it doesn’t matter how trivial each element seems. Go into as much detail as you can. For each element, notice what that means to you and how you feel about it.
Step 3. What are you proud of? Again, describe each achievement and notice what it means to you and how you feel about it.
Step 4. What are you good at?
Step 5. Check how you are feeling now, and rate it on the 1-10 scale again. To increase the positive effect, you may want to return to steps 2-4 and add more detail, so that you really experience each positive image vividly.
Do More of What Works
In contrast to problem-focused approaches to change, the Appreciative Inquiry approach says that you will get more sustainable changes if you concentrate on doing more of what’s working in your life. It is easier to imagine the future you want when it is based on your own experiences, rather than trying to dream it up from nothing.
Your vision of the future needs a strong foundation. Also, if you keep and build on the good aspects of your life now, that will reduce your unconscious resistance to change. You’ll also find that your future vision is easier for you to believe in, because it’s supported by past reference experiences of times when similar good things happened, even if they were fleeting or only happened partially.
If you’re interested in positive approaches to change like this, check out my other site, Coaching Leaders, which has lots of information about Appreciative Inquiry and related approaches, as well as leadership and coaching.
And get the free Coaching Leaders Secrets newsletter, which brings you tips and techniques for positive change every week (or so) – as well as a free step-by-step guide to getting started with Appreciative Inquiry.
This post is one of a series about preparing yourself to clear the blocks to achieving your goals.
If you want to get a head start, why not download the Achieve Your Goals self-hypnosis audio?
It’s a dual-induction guided visualisation designed to help you get clear on what you really want and get the help of your unconscious mind in achieving it.
“I have listened to the download three times. I wanted to get the sense of its effect over a few days. I feel very positive, determined and motivated. Nice intro and easy to get into the calm and relaxed state.” – Marion Anderson, UK
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