What NLP Can Learn From Appreciative Inquiry

Recently I was interviewed by Robyn Stratton-Berkessel for her ‘Positivity Strategist’ podcast about the links between NLP and Appreciative Inquiry. Appreciative Inquiry, if you haven’t come across it before, is a method for bringing about change based on finding what’s working and building on it, rather than trying to analyse and fix problems. During the […]

Are NLP Rapport Techniques Manipulative?

Having discussed some practical applications of rapport techniques from NLP such as ‘pacing and leading’, we now come to the question of ‘Is it manipulative to use these methods?’ My belief is that ultimately it depends on your intention. If respect the other person and dovetail your desired outcome with theirs, you will get a win-win […]

Influencing Skills: Real-World Applications Of ‘Pacing And Leading’

The NLP idea of ‘pacing and leading’ is based on a genuine observed psychological phenomenon, and has some very useful applications in the real world. ‘Pacing’ in NLP means matching someone, falling into step with them, entering into their model of the world. You can pace someone’s ideas, beliefs and experiences as well as their […]

Metaphors: Practical NLP Podcast 44

This week’s podcast is a quick guide to how metaphors are used in NLP and how to create them. Featuring: How metaphor is fundamental to how we think and express ourselves Why an angry person is like a volcano and a relationship is like a journey How talking about hummingbirds could resolve a conflict with […]

‘Feel, Felt, Found’ – How It Works And How To Use It Better

The ‘Feel, Felt, Found’ technique is a classic objection handling technique that most sales people know about. But how well you use it could make the difference between it working as intended, to effectively neutralise the objection in the customer’s mind and move on from it, or alternatively coming across as patronising and increasing resistance […]

Practical NLP Podcast 43: Milton Model part 5

The final part in our epic series on the Milton Model covers some patterns with offputting names! But they are easier to understand and use than the names would suggest. So find out about: Examples of ‘Switching Referential Index’ you can actually use How to make the ‘Selectional Restriction Violation’ feel more user-friendly And of […]

Practical NLP Podcast 42: Milton Model 4 – Embedded Suggestions

Continuing with our exploration of the Milton Model and how to use it, this episode covers ’embedded suggestions’ – a way of embedding a word or phrase within a longer sentence that your listener’s unconscious mind will hear as a suggestion, without their conscious mind noticing. This is useful for changework and coaching, for encouraging […]

The easy way to achieve rapport

In the Rapport 101 article we found that studies suggest that three elements have to be present for rapport to be possible: mutual attention – where each person is tuning in to the other shared positive feeling, and synchrony – where people unconsciously respond to each others’ movements and gestures When someone meets you for the first […]

Practical NLP Podcast 39: Milton Model part 2

Part 2 of the Practical NLP Milton Model podcast covers language patterns that can be classed as Generalisations and Deletions. Most commentaries on the Milton Model describe its use in trance inductions – here we look at some practical examples for a business context. Includes: How to use universals to help your coaching clients or employees find the morale-boosting […]

Practical NLP Podcast 38: The Milton Model part 1

The Milton Model part 1 If you want to influence people in any way, you need to know about the language patterns in NLP’s ‘Milton Model’. These are the ‘artfully vague’ patterns modelled by Richard Bandler and John Grinder from the great 20th century hypnotherapist and father of ‘indirect suggestion’, Milton Erickson. Most books covering […]